Mary’s Role in Healing our Past Hurts
As we begin to understand Mary’s role and how she always brings us closer to her Son, it is important, I think, to ponder on the fact that Mary is a mother. It is her vocation. She is the Mother of God as solemnly defined by the Church at the Council of Ephesus in 431. As a mother, she has the great gift and burden of caring for her children. Jesus gave His mother to us when He said to her from the cross, “Woman, behold your son.” And to the disciple John, “Behold your mother” (John 19:26-27). Christ makes her the Mother of all the living. Therefore, Mary is our heavenly mother. If we are so blessed to have a kind, good and nurturing earthly mother to help us in our understanding of what motherhood is, then we will have a good start in understanding how Mary can help us with our own healing. If that is not the case, then we might have some difficulty in giving Mary permission to help us in our present situation. It is for this particular reader that I wrote this piece.
Whether you are struggling in understanding Mary’s role in eternity or not, it is important to accept the fact that Jesus continues to love and care for His mother Mary in the heavenly realm. Jesus knows the great benefit of a Mother. He desires that for each and every one of us, hence His great gift to us from the cross. Jesus gives only good things to His friends. But we are more than Jesus’s friends–we are His brothers! By virtue of His Sonship and the Incarnation (the Word made flesh), we have become part of the Kingdom family of God. We are children of God and in truth, Jesus’s brother or sister by virtue of His humanity. What an incredible gift! And so, whether we like it or not, we get Mary as part of that package.
Like a good big brother, Jesus models for us how a son should act towards his mother. He listens to her, especially her heart. Recall how Jesus responded to Mary at the wedding feast at Cana when Mary finds out that the bride and groom ran out of wine. Mary’s heart goes out to the couple and approaches her Son, “They have no wine.” Then she directs the waiters, “Do whatever he tells you” (John 2:4-5). And Jesus does! He turns the water into wine–the best wine! Venerable Fulton Sheen said, “The water looked at its maker and blushed.” What an exchange of love between those two hearts: the Immaculate Heart of Mary and the Sacred Heart of Jesus. 
The great news for us is that Jesus continues to listen to His mother in heaven just as He did on earth. Why wouldn’t he? Why would he revoke her role as mother on His own life upon His exit from this world? The truth is, He doesn’t. Jesus continues to honor His mother in paradise and He does so primarily by sharing Her with us. She is our mother too.
Just like Mary’s heart went out to the couple in need at the wedding at Cana, Mary’s heart hurts and breaks for each one of us whenever we hurt or are in pain. She naturally rushes to her Son for aid. The results are the same. Jesus acts upon her wishes and helps. Now here’s the kicker! We can go to Jesus and ignore Mary like many of our Protestant brethren and Jesus hears our prayers, but it is a more perfect way to go to Jesus through Mary. Why? For one, it honors His Mother. How pleasing this is to the Son. Jesus doesn’t want us to ignore His mother when He never did in His earthly life nor does now in heaven. Jesus said, “Learn from me, for I am meek and humble of heart” (Matthew 11:29. So if Jesus is our model, then we must follow His lead if we are going to be like Him. Secondly, Mary takes our petition and presents it to her Son in a way we never could. St. Louis de Montfort explains it best through this analogy:
“It is as if a peasant, wishing to gain the friendship and benevolence of the king, went to the queen and presented her with a fruit which was his whole revenue, in order that she might present it to the king. The queen, having accepted the poor little offering from the peasant, would place the fruit on a large and beautiful dish of gold, and so, on the peasant’s behalf, would present it to the king. Then the fruit, however unworthy in itself to be a king’s present, would become worthy of his majesty because of the dish of gold on which it rested and the person who presented it.”
Whether you agree with de Montfort’s analogy or the opinion of St. Maximilian Kolbe who said “United to the Holy Spirit as his spouse, she is one with God in an incomparably more perfect way than can be predicated of any other creature,” the choice in the end will be yours. Borrowing from Joshua, as for me and my house, we choose to go to Mary. I choose to unleash the same joy in my life that the couple at Cana received. What do you have to lose? Give it a try! Entrust your broken heart and wounded past to the maternal care and protection of your spiritual mother Mary. Jesus will be happy knowing that you appreciate His mother too!
In Christ’s healing love,
Mark Houck